One of the suckiest things about my life is that a lot of my really good friends are all far away. It's weird because a lot of my friends, I've met online and then have met in person eventually. One is one of my best friends in the whole world. I used to live five hours from her, now I live like a billion hours from her and it sucks. Yet, I know I can always count on her to understand me when I text her some totally off the wall, random, usually sexually related bullshit, she'll respond back with equally asinine something that will have me cracking up and in tears. Today she got to read my obsessive instant messages about my life, and even though she has got like a 101 (and that's not a lie) things going on in her life, when I said "Oh I'm going there bitch, and you will read it." She just said "go". We all need friends like that, even when they're crampy and halfway passing out on the couch. They'll let you "go" when you need to get it out.
I'm not so great with the friend thing, but that's what I like about my friends. They get that. I'm kind of stand offish. I don't really need the constant companionship of others. Most my friends I can go weeks without talking to, and usually they have to contact me. They'll call, I'll call back whenever. It's a really shit way to be, but I don;t know how to be anything else.
I love my friends though. All of them. I don't make friends easily, but when I do, I keep them for life for the most part. I have found that clingy people I will eventually end up not speaking to anymore. I have found that organized friendships (Groups and stuff like that) I can't get behind.
I told someone today I was shy. This is true. If I know you, and I've known you for awhile, I'm an open book. Loud, obnoxious, bossy. But when there are new people, I'm quite reserved. I don't know what to say, I get nervous. It's actually quite adorable. Ok, that's not true.
I would love to one day move all my friends to one city. All of them. Make them my little pets. I will feed them alphalpha sprouts and scratch their little ears. Because that's not at all weird.