I went and read some inspirational quotes to see if I could find something that fit my life right now and I found the PERFECT quote....
Mother Theresa, social activist
"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much."
It actually made me giggle, because it's a positive message, as in hey I can get through anything that comes my way, but it has a bit of snark to it which makes it funnier because it's Mother freaking Theresa! Even Mother Theresa was all "Ok, God, SERIOUSLY?!?". That makes me feel good to know that even a she felt pushed to her limit sometimes and that remaining positive and upbeat can sometimes be tough.
Interesting side note, Mother Theresa struggled with her faith all her life, and near the end of it felt no presence of God. Is it sad I find comfort in this as well?
I am feeling good about my life, but I feel overwhelmed a LOT. More than I care to admit. Thinking of my future scares the crap out of me, and facing the possibility of doing it all alone scares me too. Sometimes, I get bitter because I feel like I always have to be upbeat and positive, because to be down and pissy makes me seem like a typical spurned ex wife, go through life begrudgingly only because I HAVE to do this.
I am lucky I have two great kids and I have a job that I like that gets me home at a decent hour. I like that I have my mom so close and that our relationship is only growing stronger. I like the freedom of being a single mom, of not having to worry about what any man in my life wants or needs from me right now. That doesn't mean that I don't feel filled with doubt and worry from time to time. That doesn't mean I get jealous over what my married friends have that I no longer have. The key is not to DWELL in that bad place and I think I'm doing well with that.