Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The Sound of Anger

Hearing Tony's voice pisses me off. It wasn't that long ago when I would be hurt and offended if he called the house and didn't want to talk to me. Lately, I've been hoping he skips me over. He doesn't. It's like he knows what I want and does the opposite just to piss me the hell off. Usually he needs to call to ask for help with whatever issue he's got going on at he time.

Today, it was access to his Star Card account. Two weeks ago it was his My Pay info. How he will survive is beyond me. I asked him at one point today if I should just forward the info to his new girlfriend. Seriously.

At the beginning of this whole crazy situation he accused me of "always having my hands in evertyhing" well.. duh. If I didn't have my hands in everything NOTHING WOULD GET DONE. We're talking about a man who ruined us financially at one point because of PIZZA. He'd write a check for pizza every night while I was at work, never once checking to see if there was money to cover those checks. He thought the checks were magic money.

I don't know what he's going to do. He's hasn't paid a bill in 12 years. He can't tell you how much we have in checking or savings, what his credit limits are and if he's close to them yet. I asked him today if he knew that he's maxed out his Star Card. Of course he didn't know that. Why was his Star Card maxed out? Because dumb ass lost his debit card to our account. He claims to have called to get it replaced but it never arrived. He opened up another acccount to a different bank but since he knows nothing of our current bank he couldn't figure out how to transfer money. He asked me to do it. I laughed and hung up the phone. So, instead of figuring it out, he charged everything. I told him to today that I refuse to take responsibility for that card. I even paid over the amount due by a few hundred dollars while he has been gone and he still maxed it.

I've been careful with money. I don't want it to come back and bite me in the ass later that I spent his hard earned cash. Yes, there are some things I like to buy. Target clearance is my new best friend. I feel like a caretaker to his house. Therefore I would earn a wage and I'll buy myself some new skirts or shoes. Also, I'm going to have to join the workforce soon. I need clothes for that as well.

I told him today to not talk to me on the phone anymore. I can't take it. The sound of his voice infuriates me, especially when he's asking for help. He accuses me of being controlling, yet I see it as I never really had any other choice. I HAD to take care of these things. I didn't necessarily like doing it, but someone had to do it or bills didn't get paid. Sure, I made some mistakes along the way. Hell, I suck something terrible at math and have imposed a few numbers causing errors NOT in our favor. I keep a budget that I've tried to show him on many occasion, only to have him zone out.

I worry about him sometimes but I just tell myself he had a good thing going here and he blew it. Better luck next time, Tony.


  1. Oh yeah he can screw himself if he wants your help. NOT ALLOWED. (unless you want) but I always think that's lame when someone wants to get divorced but still wants help with stuff. no way.

  2. Hello, I'm Elle. Anyway, what a bastard! How dare he even call for help when he's the one who screwed up his life? The joke is on him and his girlfriend. Apparently, girlfriend doesn't know how dependent Tony is on other people and then the bs he's capable of pulling. Sucks to be her right now, and awesome to be you to finally rid of such a leech.