Wednesday, May 12, 2010

How Did We Get Here

How did we get here?
I used to know you so well.
But, how did we get here?
Well, I think I know


Decode by Paramore

When I got my Iphone a few weeks after the "big day" I used this song as my ringtone. Just a constant, everday reminder that my life was a big ball of suck.

Yesterday, I changed it to a punk version of "Umbrella" So there you go. Now I get nice happy tune.. er um as long I don't listen to the lyrics that are actually very romantic and sweet. DAMN IT!

Anyway, how did we get here? There are so many different answers. None of them really matter though. None of it can be changed. We can go back to the first day and see where circumstances and events pushed us together and consequently to this place.

I know through my writing I paint Tony as a villain. I have to say that these are my feelings that I write, but I don't think of him as a villain. Obviously, this is my version of the story. No side is right or wrong.

One thing I do want to make clear is that I love Tony very much. I think I always will. He will always be the father of my children no matter how annoyed he makes me or how angry. Our marriage wasn't a mistake because we got two beautiful gifts out of it. We were young and we grew apart. That is all there is too it.

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